Power Exchange

A power exchange is very much akin to a delegation of authority, only more sexual.  I will openly say that the power exchange within our relationship is not a straightforward as an instruction book or pulp fiction novel will tell you. This is mainly because it involves real people with feelings, egos, baggage and love.  I’m being honest here, no roses around the door of a film set in a thatched cottage in 1940’s England.

“Do you love me?”

”Yes I love you darling”

”Oh how super, mother will pleased.”

A power exchange is serious business for both parties. One person must have the conviction of handing it over, and the other to meet the expectations of both.  It’s a balancing act of the extreme.  Those that find the managing a power exchange easy can skip the next few paragraphs and click the ‘like’ button, as there’s nothing really that will interest you here.

From a Dom’s perspective, or mine, to be exact, taking control from a person who is more often than not three days ahead of you all the time is a challenge.  I tend to be more effective when the clock can be heard ticking down. Missy on the other hand prefers planning way in advance in a circular motion; her brain is an ever-turning network of cogs that interlock, perpetually moving and generally on time.  The margin for error in avoiding the interruption of such an expensive timepiece is narrow, and therefore, frequent.

The power exchange we share, and it is a shared experience, breaks down often.  We have a blended family that is large and now mostly adult.  The days of being fully in control of our children are fading fast for us, and the effort we put in to make them independent individuals has its challenges when you want to regain a grasp.  Too many wannabe Doms!  It’s little events like this, and many more, which test us.

Hang on though, don’t write this post off as an example of a failed power exchange. There are times when it works quite nicely thank you. In fact, when it does Missy becomes the horny, cock hungry and arse attention seeking girl you could ever want!  The power exchange feeds that’s erotic desire without it really being obvious.  Having the last word in a relationship is not a turn on, however, being in an elected post whereby you make the decision based on discussion takes time. Yes, it does feel like Missy has influenced the outcome a lot of the time, but she is clever, tenacious, and focussed; why would I be with a woman who could not think for herself and make balanced assessments to support both of us?

The power change is an ideal, and life is not like that all the time, so please don’t beat yourself up if it goes wrong occasionally. For a Dom it is disappointing when you have not hit the bar, and you may have to apologise more than you want. Just try and learn from it and next time you may avoid stopping the clock!





Posted in Kinky Play and tagged , .


  1. This made me smile – “I tend to be more effective when the clock can be heard ticking down. Missy on the other hand prefers planning way in advance in a circular motion”

    I am a bit like you – my man is too but even so he can not abide me being late – I have been punished for that before now!

Please leave a thought if you have one..

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.