Letter to Myself

Write a letter to your first love…or to your younger self at that time. What did you take away from that relationship? What do you remember? Are your memories happy, sad…bittersweet? How did you grow?” (I wrote this for Bridget Delany’s #EroticJournalChallenge and never finished it – but I have now!)

Don’t throw this away, I know you want to, because I know you too well.  I’m writing this through the power of the internet, and I know you don’t know what that is, so we’ll just call it magic. Before I start, let me reassure you that I am you, but from the future. In fact 35 years ahead in the future. You are now 16, have a tattoo on your arm done by a guy in a shed and you secretly fancy your friend Michelle. I think that’s confirmation enough.

Why am I writting to you may wonder? Before you get excited, no I am not going to give you the lottery numbers, although that could be tempting now I think about it!  I am writing to tell you that life will be okay, but you do need to change the path you are on with girls.  A fuck at a party does not constitute as a relationship, even an encore doesn’t make it more so. Learn to understand feelings, your feelings. It’s really important you examine yourself mentally to know who you are.   I also want you to go to college and study. The army isn’t for you; higher education will help more in later life for the world you will end up in, possibly.  You are bright despite what you are being told, and most of your teachers have lost the will to live, so don’t be so hard on them.  Learn how to study; it’s a skill you do not have, and neither do you parents, so seek advice.

The friends you have now, keep them. Despite all their bad habits, some will do well and others will need your help. The group you are trying be part of are shallow, you know it, so stick the friends you have.

You will have children and you’ll be proud of them. Your marriage will be difficult but in the end, at the time of writting this, your life will be better and a long way from where you are now. I cannot say more than that.

Learn to save money and learn to look after your body.  Both will support you when you reach 50. Please do those two things and help me out!

Don’t sleep with Jeff’s sister at this coming New Year. She has crabs and her brother, who is in the Royal Marines, will blame you! Forget Lisa, she is a lost cause and her path will not change I promise you.

Enjoy the time you have with your remaining grandparents. They don’t have long and have so much knowledge to impart. Enagage with them and give them your time; you have plenty of it.  Oh, when you get married do not forget your parents regardless of influences. They will be around for a long time yet and they need you more than your need them. They are very important as you will come to see.

And finally, I wish you luck.  If you ignore 50% of what I have told your life will only be marginally better.  I wouldn’t change the life I have had so far; I quick polish maybe and few tweaks as I have listed. Generally you will be okay but don’t mistake good leadership for self sacrafice – you are replaceable!

P.S. – Wednesday 15th April 2015 – 1, 18, 22, 25, 31, 39 (42) – Don’t forget to buy a ticket!


Posted in Being a Dom and tagged , , .


  1. Lovely self reflection HL. It would be nice to go back and change or influence things, especially at such a difficult age. But we learn (hopefully in the end) from mistakes so they have to be made, plus if you were anything like me as a teenager you probably wouldn’t listen anyway.

  2. Ha! The crabs bit made me laugh out loud! Wouldn’t we all like to tell our younger selves a few things? I’d go back and tell myself to look in the mirror and love the image a bit more. But, would we listen? Probably not. You’ve given your younger self some good advice, though.

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