Is anyone there?


Do you use your blog to communicate to your partner?

Don’t worry, this isn’t a deep and meaningful post full of dramatic skylines and prosaic monologue!  I’m just curious if you are in a similar position.

Missy and I have the ability to communicate quite well  (although there’s always room for improvement) and not all thoughts can be captured and translated at the time. This can either be that I was not listening properly, or that was listening properly I was not or possibly listening I was not properly. Either way, the message sometimes does not get through, especially if it’s subtle and I am thinking about something else!  I’m stacked that way, please don’t throw bricks!

What I have discovered over the past two years is that a lot of missy’s inner thoughts relating to our relationship are laid out bare for me to see in her writing. Not only do I see evidence of her concerns and successes, I also see her imagination that is fuelled by talking to others or reading their tweets and blogs. It is wonderful to read a piece of her writing and think ‘wow,’ that’s hot!

I should point out that I do not have an issue with her sharing this, in fact I welcome it.  It allows me, in my own time, to read and inwardly digest.  I also provides me with a written record of how she was feeling and where she thinks she would like to go next on our journey having taken time to develop her thoughts in a creative way.

When I look back at my own ramblings over the years I see many examples where I have done the same, and not always unintentional.  Yes, I do know that missy reads everything I write, as do I for her, which I suppose provides a subliminal reserved seat for each other in our theatre of life.

Therefore, I wonder if you are the same. Do you use this medium to communicate with your partner in some way or is this just for everyone else?



Posted in Being a Dom, Building A Dynamic and tagged .


  1. I think I do the same thing… Sometimes I do worry that I say too much and reveal too much but ultimately I suppose that’s part of who I am..

  2. I do, I know when I write an erotic story for something like the a-z challenge, my imagination becomes very high, like you, Master reads everything and stores ideas up. Most of what i write, is stuff i find incredibly hot and would love to happen, if we had the house to ourselves. I’m not the best at putting ideas forward verbally, so I often use WhatsApp or talking about it in a blog. We have our own WhatsApp group, just for us so any kink talk goes in there. Master tends to have no problems talking about things, so it’s just usually mine. But I’ve never been any different.

      • Haha I suppose so xD I do enjoy that I’ve got free reign over writing more personal posts (his rule is as long as it doesn’t “out” us per say, “write whatever you want about us” he says) so I suppose now it doesn’t feel as over sharing as much now! xD

  3. You summed it up quite precisely. Whilst my blog is for myself, much of the writing is about myself and the relationship and activities with my domme.

    We have an official channel where much is communicated but there are things I find I can’t say directly there. The blog allows me to express those things. In some way it’s like casting the thoughts in to the ether. The blog never identifies her, so it’s easy to think I’m writing to an idealised internal representation of her. It probably also helped that when I first started writing she never actually read it.

    She does read it now. I find it rather reassuring to be able to send messages, sometimes difficult personal messages in this manner.

  4. While my blog is for me, it is also for Daddy to read. He has mentioned similarly to what you wrote, that he loves reading things I have written and thinking, “wow, that’s hot!”. I try not to put anything on here that I haven’t discussed with him first, but as time goes on, he continues to give me more and more reign to write whatever I would like (he was very concerned about anonymity before…still is, but now he sees how much of our true selves we can share without being outed). Occasionally, I’ll leave a little note to him on one of my posts about something I would like to try or do….that always gives him a chuckle 🙂

  5. Mr D doesn’t read my blog. We
    sometimes discuss things I have written about it things that have come up from expressing myself in this way. He has mentioned that he would like to read it one day. I feel a little apprehensive about that. My writing is not very intelligent and I’m pretty positive he gets enough of my rambling mind on a daily basis.

    • I saw completely different side to missy reading her material. You say your writing is not very intelligent? Yes some people’s writting can capture you, throw you around and spit you out wanting more, but not many. I write what comes out of my head, most of it is badly written, the grammer is poor and the structure a mess. Your comment and that of others validates my writting not a paid critic. I love your writing, it’s honest,to the point and colorfull. What more can a reader ask? 😉

  6. I had this blog before I met HD (it’s a reincarnation of my original one). I created it as a place to share my writing, particularly erotica, since I didn’t have another outlet. The “personal posts” kinda took over, lol.

    While HD reads it, I write primarily for myself. It helps me process and I find I am more articulate in writing than I am verbally, so it helps me explain things I can’t otherwise and prepares me for discussing them with him directly. Even though I don’t write -for- him, reading my blog helps him understand how I feel in ways that conversation doesn’t. It also aids in our discussion, opening dialogue that would be overlooked otherwise.

    He also enjoys the teasing, especially from FC. Apparently calling me a chipmunk is “funny” to him. *scowl*

    In a way, I wish he had a place to share his thoughts. He talks, but not quite as much as I would like, and I always worry that I’m asking for too much or pushing too hard or not pushing enough or I’m waaaaaay off target…and while he’s good at reassuring me, I don’t always know where his mind is. Have a peek into his thought process would be a relief.

    • I use this to offload the weird stuff in my head. As time has gone on I have become more adventurous and let personal aspects creep in. It will be just pure smut in a year!!

  7. I know for sure that I do the same thing. Many times the things I write about are messages to my husband. Things I know I can say to him, but that when I want to, I cannot seem to find the words or the moment is not right or I try and it comes out totally different than I wanted it to. Then I write about it and if he reads that, there is a better understanding. ‘Funnily’, after I have written about it, even if he hasn’t read it, I find it easier to find the words to talk about it.

    Rebel xox

  8. I hope to reach this point in my relationship- where I can have such open conversations with my partner about our sex life without it becoming an emotional maze of trip wires and land mines. It is easier to remain silent and shackle my submissive inside me but I find myself tearing apart from the inside as a result so I am putting in the effort to open up to my husband about the extent of my sub desires and hope he can begin to open his mind to the possibility of a sub wife. We have a long way to go but your blog gives me hope. Thank you!

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